Frozen in Time: Change what you say, read, watch and discuss.

Change what you say, read, watch and discuss. 

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Trying

Who do you surround yourself with? It makes a difference. I have been known to use inappropriate language, usually when pushed beyond a good point. Always ask friends and co-workers NOT to surprise me. 

Several years ago someone came into my house and even with our protests made volumes of food my Mother and I should not eat. Then, without warning, they left everything for me to clean up! Going into my kitchen saw the farm-sized sink piled high with dishes with food and flatware still ‘intact’.  The countertops were a mess too.

The piece de’resistance was going to the trash can. A trash bag was replaced by our guests incorrectly so it fell and was useless.  Even tho’ obviously useless, it had been used for throw-away food by our cook. 

One. Two. Three.

In public relations we always want THREE minimum pieces of coverage to make a difference in whatever we are publicizing.  It works in other ways too. I lost it at THREE. Three surprises. 

Does not excuse me.

Yes, I said it, I did. One time, the first time in a very long time. Over five years ago. This was during the time I was my Mother’s main caregiver, I was emotionally exhausted. (It was a privilege to be with her and would do it again in a New York minute.) But was always mentally tired.  Makes me cry now. 

An apology was demanded by email from the cook and family.  It was very hard to do – after consulting a wise friend, I apologized. Tried to create a dialogue to avoid the same thing happening again. The clean-up took two days, think I cried the entire time cleaning. In short, I was told my apology was not genuine and they ‘boycotted’ me, even when coming to see Mother, turning their heads away from me if they passed me in my own house. Their child even turned her head upon the sight of me. I was heartbroken, as was my Mother.  

When Mother died there was a brief apology, only to be followed by a renewed boycott for something else. I have apologized. Was never allowed the requested option of meeting face-to-face. 

Seque today. The sermon was Forgiveness. Forgiveness. Dare I say, it soothed my heart to hear? Do I still have work to do? OF COURSE, believe I always will.  

It’s my hope you will go to this site and listen to today’s lesson. Whatever one’s religious beliefs it’s a good message. It’s a life message. I’ll be listening again.

http://r-c.org/page/forgiveness

Will look forward to hearing your thoughts.

In today’s society, filled with vitriol we need to practice forgiveness more than ever. If in my life I’ve hurt you, I ask your forgiveness.  Life is too short. 

It starts with us. ALL of us.

"Where One Day Ends, A New Day Begins"

“Where One Day Ends, A New Day Begins”                                   Artist Kelly Shipp

 

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Rule #20. Don’t Surprise

Rule #16 explained don’t surprise….It’s my best example of what not to do and why.

I just really want to share a few GOOD surprises I’ve received in 2013.

Surprise #1

Met my first whistle blower!  It was exciting for me to be in the aura of such bravery.  Sometime, when it’s possible, will tell you more, but for now, all I can say is that I love knowing her. Thanks, Lori Capps for introducing us!

Nothing is more dangerous than the TRUTH.

whistleblower

Surprise #2

On the “Country Faith” CD, brain-child of Deborah Evans-Price, I was introduced to artist Jimmy Wayne.  I love, love, love his song, “SHINE”.   It reminds me of dear friend, Debra Brawner – Debra uses the word SHINE regularly — for years I’ve  watched her give others the opportunity to SHINE, me included.  SHINE is Debra’s mantra, and yes, it’s part of why I love his song, AND now, Jimmy Wayne’s music.

 “Country Faith” was my tipping point. 

Remember: It only takes one person to help another SHINE. Who can you help to SHINE today?  tomorrow?  next week?  What will be your tipping point?

Debra Brawner, left with Betty White and ‘friends’ from the Columbus Zoo!Debra and Betty White

Music artist, Jimmy Wayne, sings “SHINE” on the “Country Faith” CD.

Jimmy Wayne

“The Tipping Point”

Tipping Point book

Malcolm Gladwell, author, “The Tipping Point”

Malcolm Gladwell

SURPRISE #3

I don’t miss one. single. episode. of Dr. Phil.  Even watch the reruns on OWN.  This is the first time I can remember being this interested in any television show. I have learned SO MUCH.  His words of wisdom have helped me deal with familial problems since my Mother’s death in 2012.  I understand so much more through his shows about siblings, wills and caregivers.  I am at peace because I know others’  actions have nothing to do with me.  His words, via the shows have given me a peace that only comes with ME doing the gritty work.  I’m on the other side of my hurt now, and joyous with my life.   Surprised at myself, that I’ve actually been able to forgive those who’ve hurt me — and my late Mother — so much.  Blessed.

BUT if I could talk to him, I would ask him to QUIT SAYING  “This is not my first rodeo” over and over and over.  WE KNOW.  WE KNOW.

Dr. Phil

A Night of Honor


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