2020: the worst year of my life.

Likely this post will be all over the place, as my ‘thoughts and words” are not yet back to normal.  Artist Kelly Shipp

“Where One Day Ends, A New Day Begins.”

February 2020 sold my house and relocated to a much smaller space. Only to fall the first night I arrived. An omen of things to come?  The following is my recall the past Year.
At Baptist Hospital in August 2020 following 20+ falls, learned of three (minor) strokes; the last fall resulting in a brain bleed; AND because of the last fall also told I’m needing a shoulder replacement. 
OMGoodness
No. Just No.
Maybe this physical breakdown was to avoid or postpone an emotional one? Finally able to close my Mothers probate, put that heartbreaking debacle to rest EIGHT YEARS following her death. All-in-all i was able to keep a promise to my Mother throughout but it was nothing compared to how my heart hurt seeing such hatefulness and greed from one sibling. 
NOTHING we have is ours anyway, so why the fuss? 
My last fall was a shock, blacked out didn’t try to get up when I came to, my head was bleeding.
Thankful for Dr. Micheal Carson and P.A. LeAnne Griffin. 
It was then realized:
Whatever happens next, I’m okay, I’m at peace.  
Okay so I can get a little dramatic but peace it is.
The caveat: was told later by a friend all my words were gibberish. Since I did not realize this, continued to expound on everything and yet nothing. Some might say what’s new? 
Much of the next few weeks, most days are fuzzy. One of my neurosurgeons did not want me to stay alone.
So God sent Sharon McGhee, 

Telling her how transportation (among others) were appreciated, trying to give her money for gas, etc. Sharon responded with “that’s what we are supposed to do.”

Sharon immediately put me at ease.
Then He sent Kara Flippo, with her husband Danny’s hamburgers. Kara has either called or texted daily since I came home.
 
Know Dione Vetsch? battling her own health issues found time to bring me soups and more. Wish I was this strong and reached out to others needing help like Dione.
My then-neurosurgeon didn’t want me to be alone. So, my Sister, Dee Ann manned the phone calls. Kelly Booy lived close, we devised a plan I could live with. My sister was to call me every morning. like Lorie, Kelly was always at the ready,
Running errands, brought me food and anything else needed. Most significant Kelly was willing to share her 14-year-old daughter with me.
Arden Booy is Kelly’s daughter. Bright, beautiful, smart. The ‘apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.’  Fourteen years old, Arden is amazing. 
Deborah Evans Price and Austin Hunt knew how to help from their homes in Nashville, TN.  
 
Lorie Capps IS.A.FORCE. A FORCE for good. Her ‘TEAM’ includes husband Tim Capps and their son Cael. Knowing her forever, had NO IDEA just how bossy she could be, (said with much love and the utmost respect.) sitting in her chair at Salon Cortillo. Lorie Capps is  part therapist, a Woman for All Seasons. Literally no idea what I would do without her. A God send? Most definitely. 
Amber Bailey, my niece works six/seven days a week, yet for the past year she has been  here every time I fell within minutes. EVERY TIME. #beyondgrateful
Been sitting on this post for more than three weeks, fearing I’ve left some one  out. Decided to go ahead and post. Please forgive if I’ve left you out, my memory is not what is was – my memory certainly was never that fabulous…but now? I’ll take it.

“Lift Up Your Headt


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Into the Wild: FROZEN IN TIME: Say it Out loud; To someone who loved you then and Loves you now.

Debra and Betty White

Dear friend Debra Brawner with Betty White.Debra booked talent for TNN and we loved working with her. She remains one of my dearest friends. #Blessed.

The Laughs. So many laughs. Funny stories. Going from lots of laughter and joy to well, different is not a walk in the park.

From the laughter backstage during Star Search to Florence Henderson dancing in front of Alabama because they didn’t want her to sing with them.  Even today, when I watch a television show or a movie the background tells me more than the dialogue.

Before Facebook we took photos. These photos are a bit of a timeline to my life in Nashville prior to actually representing Musicians. Television has always been my favorite medium.

Hope you love these #ThrowbackThursday photos!

Our First Earth Day.

Our First Earth Day. Rosanne Cash was Chairman of the organization.  Rosanne and her then-husband, Rodney Crowell performed.  It was a free event for the City of Nashville.  Thanks to Rosanne and Rodney it was a tremendous success.  Even today if I do not recycle something it makes me a little crazy.

 

Watching Rehearsals.

Watching Rehearsals.  Nashville Earth Day peeps.

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David Foster playing for us in Tennessee Governor’s Mansion BEFORE we were KICKED OUT when the Governor arrived. We all laughed till we cried, then laughed more when Lee, in her full-length mink coat fell going into the local theater smack dab in the lobby.!

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Talent Explosion. Dinner at Mario’s with David Foster and Linda Thompson. #luckyme #LovedMarios

Hotel Room -- we celebrated 24/7.

Hotel Room — we celebrated 24/7.

Left to Right: Me; Gunilla Hutton; Cathy Baker and LuLu Roman. #Friendship

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Game Night – Always Fun. #nofilter

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Wonderful working with Jack Hanna and Stella Parton. Booking clients on the same show is Working Smart. Animals + Cooking = Fun Show.

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LuLu singing “Blue Chili” by Songwriter extraordinaire Beverly Ross. Still convinced this would have been a ‘hit’ for LuLu.  However, it was not Gospel, it was Blues  – always my favorite. LuLu Roman, me, Madeline Bell and CeCe Debois.

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Jack with Television Producer Joe Young. They were like Tom Hanks’ character in BIG when they got together. Great friend Susan Shockley made this happen. #Longtermfriendships

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Finally – the reason I located to Arkansas: My Family; My dear Mother.  This memory from long ago lingers: the first national television credit received, my precious Mother took a photo of the television! The memory of her encouragement in my life is somedays overwhelming.  Missing her never goes away.  Would love to talk to her, love her more than I can ever say.

Mother

My Beautiful Mother.

Do I miss friends?  Oh Yes. We do stay in touch and I’m forever grateful we can and do.  Will talk about more of my dearest as I finish this Frozen in Time post. #Thankful. #MoretoCome

Next Up: Forgive Yourself – it’s a work in progress. (AMEN)


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Into The Wild: Frozen in Time; Acknowledge How Important the Times Were.

Into The Wild: Frozen in Time; 

Acknowledge How Important the Times Were

Can't remember who 'gifted' me this frame?

Can’t remember who ‘gifted’ me this frame?

Substance. That’s what I was missing. A ‘good girl’ who got lost and didn’t know what to do with her life. Living really, day-to-day for my own enjoyment. But I did.not.know. When we don’t know, we don’t know.

My saving grace, in retrospect, was relocating to Nashville, TN. Nashville is where I found myself, who I could be. Finding a good group of like-minded friends and a great church changed my life. Gradually and with fervent prayer, I became someone I liked. Dare I say, really liked?

But let me tell you, it was a journey.  Nashville is chock full of churches. The first one I walked into – well – it was less than stellar. That’s for another time.  Otter Creek Church of Christ and Bobby Harrington, the minister, made the difference. Listening to every.single.word. So very grateful for that time of learning and pruning. Yes, not everyone who attends church can be kind, but so many are kind and loving, and more than make-up for those who are not.

Nashville, Tennessee

Bobby and Cindy Harrington

One of the best books I ever invested in, “The Complete Book of Christian Prayer” along with anything from Oswald Chambers are great devotionals. On November 25, 1996 (yes, I’m that old!) the series Purity of Heart is when my transformation began.

Prayer #575 from “The Complete Book of Christian Prayer”

Almighty God, in whom we live and move and have our being, thou hast made us for thyself, so that our hearts are restless until they find rest in thee; grant us purity of heart and strength of purpose, that no selfish passion may hinder us from knowing thy will, no weakness from doing it; but in thy light may we see light, and in thy service find perfect freedom; through Jesus Christ our Lord.

from St. Augustine, 354-430

My parents always told me I was the most beautiful, most talented with the ability to do anything. I believed them. This confidence made me brave enough to try anything, Seeing God in their eyes, their behavior made all the difference for me. Not only did I have their ‘net’   I had God’s.

Was it easy? Not always. Was it worth it?  Oh, yes.

Next up: Facing WHY were they so important?


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