Proverbs 31

A PROVERBS 31 Woman is in our midst.

Ruth Brooks Langford

A virtuous woman serves God with all of her heart, mind, and soul. She seeks His will for her life and follows His ways. She watches her tongue and speaks with wisdom. She understands that beauty is a temporal thing.

She is wise “She openeth her mouth with wisdom; in her tongue is the law of kindness” (Proverbs 31:26). The godly woman speaks with wisdom. She doesn’t throw her words in vain. She does not harm with words, is always ready to give advice.

THIS IS RUTH BROOKS LANGFORD.

There is not a job that’s too small or trivial for Ruth. She has called me daily for these last few months: to remind me to take my medicine and to check in and see  if I’d done my exercises. Who does this? 

Ruth does. I feel lucky to be in her aura during this time in  my life. 


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2020: the worst year of my life.

Likely this post will be all over the place, as my ‘thoughts and words” are not yet back to normal.  Artist Kelly Shipp

“Where One Day Ends, A New Day Begins.”

February 2020 sold my house and relocated to a much smaller space. Only to fall the first night I arrived. An omen of things to come?  The following is my recall the past Year.
At Baptist Hospital in August 2020 following 20+ falls, learned of three (minor) strokes; the last fall resulting in a brain bleed; AND because of the last fall also told I’m needing a shoulder replacement. 
OMGoodness
No. Just No.
Maybe this physical breakdown was to avoid or postpone an emotional one? Finally able to close my Mothers probate, put that heartbreaking debacle to rest EIGHT YEARS following her death. All-in-all i was able to keep a promise to my Mother throughout but it was nothing compared to how my heart hurt seeing such hatefulness and greed from one sibling. 
NOTHING we have is ours anyway, so why the fuss? 
My last fall was a shock, blacked out didn’t try to get up when I came to, my head was bleeding.
Thankful for Dr. Micheal Carson and P.A. LeAnne Griffin. 
It was then realized:
Whatever happens next, I’m okay, I’m at peace.  
Okay so I can get a little dramatic but peace it is.
The caveat: was told later by a friend all my words were gibberish. Since I did not realize this, continued to expound on everything and yet nothing. Some might say what’s new? 
Much of the next few weeks, most days are fuzzy. One of my neurosurgeons did not want me to stay alone.
So God sent Sharon McGhee, 

Telling her how transportation (among others) were appreciated, trying to give her money for gas, etc. Sharon responded with “that’s what we are supposed to do.”

Sharon immediately put me at ease.
Then He sent Kara Flippo, with her husband Danny’s hamburgers. Kara has either called or texted daily since I came home.
 
Know Dione Vetsch? battling her own health issues found time to bring me soups and more. Wish I was this strong and reached out to others needing help like Dione.
My then-neurosurgeon didn’t want me to be alone. So, my Sister, Dee Ann manned the phone calls. Kelly Booy lived close, we devised a plan I could live with. My sister was to call me every morning. like Lorie, Kelly was always at the ready,
Running errands, brought me food and anything else needed. Most significant Kelly was willing to share her 14-year-old daughter with me.
Arden Booy is Kelly’s daughter. Bright, beautiful, smart. The ‘apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.’  Fourteen years old, Arden is amazing. 
Deborah Evans Price and Austin Hunt knew how to help from their homes in Nashville, TN.  
 
Lorie Capps IS.A.FORCE. A FORCE for good. Her ‘TEAM’ includes husband Tim Capps and their son Cael. Knowing her forever, had NO IDEA just how bossy she could be, (said with much love and the utmost respect.) sitting in her chair at Salon Cortillo. Lorie Capps is  part therapist, a Woman for All Seasons. Literally no idea what I would do without her. A God send? Most definitely. 
Amber Bailey, my niece works six/seven days a week, yet for the past year she has been  here every time I fell within minutes. EVERY TIME. #beyondgrateful
Been sitting on this post for more than three weeks, fearing I’ve left some one  out. Decided to go ahead and post. Please forgive if I’ve left you out, my memory is not what is was – my memory certainly was never that fabulous…but now? I’ll take it.

“Lift Up Your Headt


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#METOO Movement Hits Home…

… Finally been able to forgive myself.

October 4, 2018, The Today Show was covering the lastest #METOO revelation – it was Connie Chung’s voice. Chung reading a letter she’d written to the media about her rape. Her words, voice resonated with me as I woke. It was like a lightning bolt, remembering an incident long-forgotten – or not.

This was my post on Facebook October 4, 2018:  

#METOO Assaulted X2 – remember exactly where I was and what I was wearing. DO NOT remember dates. The first time, I told someone (female) the same night – crickets – didn’t tell the second time. Wonder Why?

1968 – Leaving home for college was exciting.  Naive, a ‘good girl’ and rule follower, didn’t have a clue about the ‘real world’…so when someone I barely knew trapped me in a car, shocked. He only stopped when someone began approaching the vehicle.  

When I told two others what happened a few hours later, they said NOTHING. Still, remember how awkward and embarrassed that I ‘told.’ Looking back I don’t think they knew what to do any more than I did. BUT NOTHING? YES.NOTHING. So, when it happened the second time I.TOLD.NOT.ONE.PERSON. I remember feeling embarrassed and ashamed. 

Writing this blog helped me remember the 2nd time. Finally said it ‘out loud’ to a male friend during one Sunday lunch.

Realizing my history helped me understand why I began my ‘crazy years,’ and it has also helped me to forgive myself.  Cannot begin to say what forgiving myself has meant for me. 

Is it any wonder my LLC is “Still Talking” because – Good or Bad – always ‘thought’ I owned my voice. Thankful for Parents who encouraged me to do so.

So many dreams deferred, and so many years wasted. I felt like trash. Thankfully my parents loved me through it all.   

Now?

Peace. Peace beyond understanding is what I now know. Finally, feel like I am who I was ‘meant to be.’ It’s about time. 

What is the lesson I’ve learned? My over-riding belief is love conquers everything. There is not one person I hate, and my goal is to be pure of heart.  Believe me,  have to work on it every.single.day. 

This will probably sound silly to some, but GOD is my best friend. If I stay close to Him, going to be just fine. 

How lucky can one girl be?

Someone I admire greatly wrote to me recently, asking What’s next?

Never really knew until now.

“Where One Day Ends, A New Day Begins”


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Call 800.656.HOPE (4673) to be connected with a trained staff member from a sexual assault service provider in your area.

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